Facing Our End

Death is a theme that I have referred to a lot already before. You might consider this topic as sad and uncomfortable to talk about. And I don't want to give you the impression that I'm obsessed with the subject. So, there's no danger that if you meet me on a social occasion that I'll bring up the topic. On the contrary, I find myself joking about life. Since I became a full-time wheelchair user, I also find ways of mocking the way people perceive me due to my impairment. Indeed, when I feel down, I do search for conic relief.

But aren't the fact that we find comedy enjoyable because, if well done, reminds us that life can be absurd? Isn't comedy a way we are free to mock ourselves and our human habits and customs? Isn't comedy a way to deal with death and misfortune?

Obviously, death is not a joke. But consider the many plans we make in life that we never realise. The promises we make to leave what's important until tomorrow. And, to our dismay, we are thrown a surprise party by the grim reaper with it's gift of death. We don't like to think of these things of course. But sometimes I believe it's important to find a time to ask these questions as, at least for me, we would failing to make the best of what we have.

Some of us seem to live for money, pleasure and never bother to look in our own hearts and minds. It could be simply because we're afraid that we will find nothing if we delve deeper. But when we are made aware of death, then we cannot hide from our fears.

I loft one of my brothers when I was less than a few months old. Perhaps that it's why I became aware of how close we are to death and how existed is impermanence. At the sane, I was growing aware that my physical impairment made me an imperfect human specimen in both the eyes of the clergy and the scientific establishment. Indeed, people still associate impairment with death, or a reminder of their own mortality.

Thus, my hope and belief in God often conflicted with what I regarded a punishment - my impairment. And I tried to find meaning to why I was born and to why my brother had to die. But it was a fact, I knew, that my life, like a burning candle, could be extinguished just like that. And it didn't matter how long or strong the candle stick is, it only takes a breeze to put out the flame.

I wish to end on a positive note. The fact that we become aware of the impermanence of life, the more we can appreciate the precious beauty of daily life. We also realise that, at the end of the day, we are all the sane when it comes to dying. In other words, despite our many differences and disagreements, we share that inevitable end that faces us as human beings and, ultimately, connects us to every living thing on our planet.